Sunday, May 20, 2012

The State of Nothing

So, unsurprisingly, since our little turn of events on Thursday, nothing overwhelmingly positive has happened, surro-wise.  There was a lot of thinking on my part, and a lot of discussing with Tony (which equals a lot of talking on my part), and I came to the conclusion that maybe I'm not the best fit for my current agency.  They've been nothing but kind and patient with me, but I just don't know if I'm going to find my perfect match in a reasonable amount of time with them.  Based on the profiles I've seen (and I've seen a few at this point), it seems like my almost IFs aren't really the typical clients of my agency.  They are more than happy to work with gay couples, but it seems like the California gay couples tend to flock to the larger agencies.  I did take a look at profiles of several straight couples, to see if maybe my perfect match was somewhere I didn't think to look, but it just reenforced the fact that my heart is set on a rainbow baby.  It's important to me to support and be a tiny part of the LGBT community in this way.

So, with all these ramblings thoughts swimming in my head, I emailed the director of my agency on Friday, and spewed these thoughts out in the most cohesive manor I could.  And like always, she was understanding, and I received a thoughtful response swiftly.  I didn't bring this point up, but technically I'm in contract with my agency for 120 days, only about half of which we've traveled thus far.  Regardless, my director asked for 30 days to find me a match, at which point she agreed to amicably let me go to another agency.  While I would love to jump ship right now, and get things going with another agency, like, yesterday, I only feel it's fair to return a bit of the patience they've offered me, and stick with them for 30 more days.  Because there were a lot of reasons I chose this agency, and I will be happy if they can find me a match, but it's just feeling less and less likely.  She did say they may have a profile of Chinese IFs for me soon, but, as much as I try to, I find it hard to get excited about IFs halfway around the world when I almost had a pair practically in my backyard.  :)

It's important to note that I believe fairly strongly in fate (which would explain my daughter's name...), and, on Friday, I was browsing the site of the agency I will be going with if I'm matchless in 30 days (originally my second choice agency), and I found out that 2 of the 3 things I preferred at my current agency have just been matched by the other agencies new policies.  Coincidence?  Never.  :-D

Hope you all had a fantastic weekend.  I'm wrapping up yet another crazy May weekend.  Collapsing in exhaustion in 5...4...3...

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