Wednesday, November 28, 2012
There was very little in the contract that I haven't heard many times before in other paperwork I've seen, and nothing that we can't deal with. One thing that Tony brought to my attention is that we'll need permission to travel outside of a 50 mile radius after 24 weeks, which is a tiny inconvenience seeing as my in-laws live about 70 miles away and we usually visit them once a month. But I imagine if we ask politely and know exactly where a nearby, covered hospital is, it won't be a problem. Especially since my in-laws live closer to most of the nearby airports. We'll also need permission to leave the country for the cruise I'd like to take in March that includes a stop in Ensenada. :)
There also seems to be a little concern about my dyed hair, which my case manager from my old agency brought up up as well. My IFs seemed to have made the effort to be respectfully, assuming that it's important for me to dye my hair. I've had fun with my hair the last year or so, but have always planned on stopping before transfer, so that's so not an issue to me. I think that, while pregnant with my own, I dyed my hair maybe once, if at all. And definitely not in the first trimester.
Tony still needs to finish reviewing the 30 page contract, but I'm hoping to have it emailed back before we go to bed so that they can let the doctor know we're ready to go. Maybe I'll get meds for my birthday next Wednesday! :-D The lawyers' office would like for us to call and discuss the contract, but seeing as I don't really have any questions or concerns, I'm hoping we can gloss right over that and get this show on the road!
My new fantasy timeline is meds for my birthday, 3-day transfer scheduled for January 10, beautiful embryos push us back to 5-day transfer on the 12th, meaning I can surprise Tony with tickets to The Book of Mormon on the 11th for his birthday (the 14th). And then a fantastic positive beta near the end of January and a happy, healthy baby 9 months later. :-D
Wednesday, November 21, 2012
I let my case manager have a whole week off from my annoying emails last week (I generally try and keep them to once a week unless I have something relevant to say), and waited until Monday to ask for an update. So, on my behalf, she bothered the lawyers for news and they said the contract was sent to my IFs last week, and once they approve it, it comes to me. Yay!
Getting this information made me come to terms with the fact, which has been apparent for sometime, but I've been refusing to see, that we won't be transferring in 3 weeks. And I was a little bummed about that. But then I thought about it, and realized there is really no reason to be bummed. That was just an arbitrary date I had chosen on the "Get Tiffany Knocked Up ASAP" timeline. This timeline had been in place with the idea, originally, way back in March, that I would complete my first surrogacy in time to celebrate our host son's birthday with him in August 2013. With every delay along my whole journey, that has become less and less likely, and became an impossibility around the time I switched agencies. But I have been having a hard time letting go of the idea and the associated sense of urgency. Until last night. During one of my many awake hours laying in bed, I realized that I don't *need* for this to happen right this very second. Of course, the sooner the better, and I'm a little bummed I won't be giving B&C a positive pregnancy test for Christmas, but I don't need to stress about a timeline right now. As a matter of fact, transfer after Christmas would be better, because we're going to Disneyland the first week of January and I love me some Space Mountain. :-) So, for the first time in this very long process, I'm going to not worry about how fast things are moving. As long as they're moving. :-P
Also on Monday, I was thinking, casually, I hadn't heard from my IFs last week, and then I saw C liked my new family pictures on the Facebook, and I was thinking, that was nice, and that's good enough for me, a friendly, casual relationship. And then he commented. :-) And then he texted to wish us a preemptive happy Thanksgiving, and we got into a discussion regarding Black Friday. I know the relationship is in its infancy, and things will be different once we really get going, but I am just so happy with what we've got going so far. Even though things aren't moving as quickly as I thought they would (which is no longer a big deal, see above), I still feel like this is definitely the family I should be working with. Heck, I would have been content with the like on Facebook. I'm easy (as evidenced by the fact that no one will know who the father of my next baby will be). ;-)
And it's late now, and I'm rambling, and there's cranberries to make tomorrow. :-) Wishing all of my American friends a happy and hearty Thanksgiving tomorrow!
Thursday, November 8, 2012
I emailed my case manager Monday afternoon, and heard back Tuesday morning that, in fact, she did make the legal referral last Thursday and forgot to tell me about it. Yesterday afternoon I got the retainer from law office, and signed it and returned it before bed. I'm not sure how soon contracts will follow after that, but I'm choosing to be optimistic and guess 2 hours. That sounds about right, huh? :) I've been my squeaky little self and just emailed my case manager to make sure that it's been requested that the lawyers hurry their bums up with the contract. Some of my surro sisters have me paranoid, saying they've waited up to 2 months just to see a contract. Eek!
I am also feeling quite relieved about the results of the election. By no means do I think Obama is the second coming, but he was the best option by far. The embarrassing and tragic backwards leaps in human rights that may have occurred under Romney's rule made me so anxious until those final numbers were in.
I am beyond thrilled that marriage equality triumphed in three states (and voters shot down discrimination in a fourth). This is the first time same-sex marriage has won when taken to the polls. I love that this seems to represent a huge shift in the way the general public feels/thinks. If you would have asked me 10 years ago if we'd be here, I don't think even I would have been that optimistic. It's such a contrast from the bittersweet of four years ago when Obama won but Prop H8 was passed here in California. We're finally supposed to hear back from the Supreme Court on that this month sometime. Finally. It's really embarrassing that California is lagging so far behind.
Despite my happiness with the turn of the election, I was terribly disheartened by the vitriolic remarks of a few people on my Facebook. Mostly friends of friends and my Mormon aunt, but the harshness of their comments was really disgusting. You would think they (successful individuals with good jobs and nice homes) had spent the last 4 years in hell under the rule of an iron-fisted Obama. I was especially concerned by one of my very good friends, a single guy very proud and attached to his money, ranting about a tax that passed here in California in order to fund schools. I know that I should let post-Election Day comments roll off my back, but... :-/
I'll just enjoy being on the winning side for a while. :-D
Sunday, November 4, 2012
To be fair, an actual natural disaster may be responsible for a little bit of our delay, so I'm trying to be sensitive and patient regarding all that. And I really have been. The only place I'm not patient is here and in my head, so it doesn't affect anyone involuntarily. :)
I've been in contact with my IFs a little throughout this week (I totally involuntarily grinned when I wrote "IFs." And used "involuntarily" twice in 2 sentences. :-/ I strongly dislike being repetitive in my prose, but this Daylight Savings business has me exhausted and my brain no work good right now.), which has been nice. Checked up on them during Sandy, and wished them a Happy Halloween, and got to see a picture of their son all dressed up. :-D
I'm a little unsure about how to progress the relationship at this point. I certainly want to know more about them, and share more about myself, but texting seems like an odd medium for that. I'm leaning towards email, but I know how hard it is to get a chance to respond thoughtfully to an email with a two year old running around and an otherwise full day. And there's that tiny little voice that says "Don't be too anxious! They'll think that's weird! Chillax!" But I like them, and think that we could be friends, and I think that they're waiting on me to take the lead on this, because they emphasized having a relationship that *I* was comfortable with. But maybe I'm being too eager... And, hey, if they've gotten the chance to venture over to my blog, now it's all mote. :-p :-D But the main plan for this week is to write them an email, touching on some of the things I forgot to ask but am curious about (For example, do they have any interest in me pumping? Do they want me to test before beta?), and sharing a little bit more about Life Thompson. :-D
Two things before I rest my weary head: Don't forget to vote for equal rights on Tuesday. I won't say who, exactly, you should be voting for, but I trust your judgment. ;) Secondly, we had a super fantastic Halloween. Witness us in all of our glory: